Thursday, March 8, 2012
The Good Wife's Guide from the 50's
Have dinner ready.
Yup. I kinda gotta agree there. A hard-working man deserves a nice meal (most nights) when he gets home from work. I only prepare a meal early if it benefits me though, not Jay! Meals won't necessarily be ready "on time for his return" because that time varies greatly...which also is really hard to plan sometimes. The new general rule of thumb is that supper is super early at our house now, like at 5, latest 5:30 to try to prophylactically cure Braden from his witching hour.
15 minutes to rest with a toddler to chase after and make sure he's not dunking my iPhone in the toilet. Ummmm....nothankyou! I do agree to try and freshen up a bit. There's been some days where I know I don't have to leave the house and I look at myself in the mirror at the end of the day (or even partially through the day) and think "wow! You didn't even try at all!" I even apologized to Jay last week that I looked like crap and really didn't but any effort in whatsoever to even run a brush through my rat's nest. Also, I'm "work-weary" from cleaning the house, doing laundry, cooking, and chasing Braden all day!
Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him.
HAHAHA!!!! that. is. all. Braden's interesting enough for the two of us.
Clear away the clutter.
I'd say we both equally create the clutter, but I'm definitely the cleaner upper of the clutter...because it bugs me way more than him...so I do this for me!
During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by.
Is this shit for real? Pardon my frankness...but seriously! Umm...we have a lovely fireplace and if he wants to use it, he can flip the switch that turns it on just fine, all by himself! Making him happy will make me happy? Usually when he makes me happy I'm happy! ;)
Minimize all noise.
Were there no such things as toddlers in the 50's? They want me to clean, yet turn off all the cleaning machines? Braden just isn't quiet, sorry!
Be happy to see him.
Well, that's not hard because I am always happy to see Jay!
Listen to him.
Yeah sometimes I zone out, I admit it. And if something's on my mind, I'm gonna ask him so as to not forget. And sorry, he's not more important than me, nor I him. Equality, baby!
Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
I agree, but there are exceptions to every rule. "You said you were going to be home 45 minutes ago! You didn't get the mail?"
Make him comfortable.
I'm pretty sure Jay can seat himself or lie himself down, thank you very much. If he wants a cold drink, he knows where the fridge is too! But if he asks me nicely to grab him a cold one, I'm always happy to oblige.
Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes.
Sorry is this only done for Braden...and will stop as soon as he can do it himself too.
Speak in a low, soothing, pleasant voice.
I am a loud mouth kinda...so I'm not sure this is possible.
Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity.
The master of the house? No no no...equality people!
And lastly - A good wife always knows her place.
Yup...my place is wherever I want to be!
I'm sure this was a joke. It had to have been...right? I'm not one to let people walk over me, I can stand up for myself and Jay certainly never has never tried to control me...but I certainly couldn't be the "servant wife" that this article wants me to be! This is what I want: