Haters Gon' Hate

Recently on Twitter I saw that Kristin and Rachael were having a discussion on this awful *website they had come across that is essentially making fun of mommy bloggers. It's not just a website making fun of bloggers, it's a website dedicated to making fun of things that they feel shouldn't be on the internet. At the end of the day, these people are just bullies. And the most cowardly kind - anonymous bullies that hide behind their keyboards and don't have to be accountable to anyone.
*I do not want to give this website any credit, but if you're curious like me and would like the link, tweet or email me.

I definitely had a moment of panic. What if someone makes fun of me? This blog? Or worse yet, my son? Making fun of a baby? Really? you might ask...? Well, this site made a point of making fun of Kristin's 4 month old daughter. Give me a break, SHE'S A BABY!!! We are all entitled to our own thoughts and opinions, obviously...this is part of the reason why I blog! I figure if you like what I have to say, you'll keep coming back, join my site, and come along for the ride. If not, if I've offended you in any way, you'll just politely leave or send me and email telling me what I've done. I realize that having a public blog, advertising said blog, and joining other blog sites...I'm "putting myself out there" for critique...but at the same time, do I really deserve to hear it? I've read other blogs where writers have gotten hate email because a mom struggling with fertility had finally gotten pregnant again...and was venting that she was extremely ill with puking to the point of being hospitalized. and the email said that she should have been grateful she was pregnant at all! Can you believe it? Another time she was simply blogging her thoughts on forward vs. rear-facing car seats and a reader wrote her a you-might-as-well-kill-your-daughter-if-you're-not-going-to-extend-rear-face-her email! She didn't even say she was going to do it, she was just discussing it!

I just don't get the hate. Back to the old saying:

"If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."

To turn this post more positive, why do I love blogging?

• sharing our life with family & friends, a WONDERFUL way to keep them updated in a creative way!
• meeting new friends
• getting advice/tips from other moms
• learning more about photography
• I have never been so creative in my life
• it inspires me to be a better mom, wife, chef, & baker!
• the opportunities to work with mompreneurs & companies to blog about their products & do giveaways
• winning free stuff!
• keeping a virtual scrapbook/baby book for Braden

So anyways, I just had to get that first part off my chest because it bothered me so much, and the second part...could be a whole other post!

To my blogger friends...have you ever had to deal with haters and how do you deal with them?

TV is Not the Devil...

...parents who use the TV as a babysitter are the ones to blame! I've seen this article:

"Parents Urged Again to Limit TV to Youngest"

So I'll give you a moment to browse through that article. Did you? Okay...

I've seen this shared by many people and many pages on Facebook...and I'm sorry, but I don't agree. I have always thought parents who turn on the TV as a means of childcare, need a slap in the face. Yup, I made a statement and will probably get emails and comments telling me how horrible I am for saying such a judgemental thing. When I worked in pediatrics on a surgery unit, tons of our nurses would pull the bedside TVs into young baby's cribs to entertain them. I'm pretty sure that babies (I'm talking infants, under 1 year) don't give a rat's uterus about what's on Tree House. Years and years before I was married and certainly before I was ready to have kids of my own, I decided I wasn't going to be a "TV mom". Also, I still think Tree House is awful and can hear the "you're watching Tree House!" jingle in my head now and again from the trauma of having Tree House on 24 hours a day at work as a peds nurse! (But that's my own personal vendetta against Tree House, I certainly don't think it's bad programming for children).

Phew. So the American Academy of Pediatrics argues in this article that TV has no educational value to children under 2. I agree, completely. I honestly have Thomas or Bob on most of the day for Braden as background noise. He plays very well on his own and with me, and quite frankly has the attention span of an almost 2 year old. 10 minutes watching TV, tops.

"So far, there is no evidence that exposure to any of these gadgets causes long-term developmental problems, experts say."

Good. Point proven, on my end anyway. I completely and totally agree that children learn more from interaction and play than they do from staring at a TV, iPad or laptop all day. Braden certainly won't have a TV in his room, ever, and he would much much much rather be outside playing or going to the park, or even reading books with me, than watching Thomas or Bob. When the day comes when I ask Braden to come outside and play and he says "No, Toe Toe!" or "No, Bob!"...meaning he'd rather stay in and watch TV, then I'll know we might have a problem.

Not gonna apologize for this!

This article is not going to change my mind on having the TV on for my child, has it changed your mind?

*ETA: Thanks for the comments thus far - I totally agree with you - moderation is the key!!*

P.S. It's still Flashback Friday! I can hardly believe we were doing this, this day last year...

And Braden was doing this...we miss Zoey so much still!

Why Don't You Cloth Diaper?

As moms, we have this unfortunate reflex in us to "compete". It starts even before our babies are born...

• How much weight did you gain? Oh...I only gained "this" much weight...you fatty!
• When was your baby born? Mine was right on his due date, it must be awful to be overdue!
• You're giving birth naturally? Why would you do that to yourself - just take the drugs...or an epidural!

But...after the baby is born? Grow some thick skin and oil it up and be prepared to try your dardnest to let the competing just slide right off your thick skin!

• You're not breastfeeding? That is what is best for your baby!
• You don't have the baby sleeping with you? What if something happens - horrible mommy!
• Your baby doesn't sleep through the night? Clearly you are doing something wrong!
• You're not using cloth diapers? Don't you care about the environment?

So the point of this post is to not make you feel like the judgment in the last bullet. I hope to all my family, friends, and readers that I have never come across as Judgy McSoapbox Mom, when it comes to all things mommyhood and parenting. We all have millions of decisions to make on this journey and I certainly acknowledge this and would never want to give anyone a hard time, it's hard enough to make the decision as it is.

The reason why I write this post is to just understand why you have chosen not to cloth diaper your child(ren), out of pure curiosity (just call me whiskers...I'm curious like a cat!). I just finished my copy of Kelly Wel's new book "Changing Diapers: The Hip Mom's Guide to Modern Cloth Diapering" (which is brilliant) and literally that question stuck out in my head. Why doesn't everyone use cloth? The answer that popped immediately was - "moms/moms-to-be just don't know enough about it, or that it's even out there to make the choice!" I believe cloth diapering has a domino effect. My sister-in-law Laura got me hooked on it before Braden was born. I hadn't really thought about what diapers I would or wouldn't use until I saw her start to use cloth on Luke when he was about 6 months old. Luke was actually wearing a similar diaper to the one on the cover of that book and he looked SO cute in it. I asked Laura more about them over the months and was 100% sold that I would cloth diaper our baby. I trust Laura 100% all things mommy/baby related - she does her research and does it right...so when she told me FuzziBunz were her favorite go-to diaper...I decided I'd invest my pickles with FuzziBunz too. Then I got thinking about it more...and realized I had more reasons to use cloth...

1. The savings...oh the savings! ($1500-$2000 per child savings using cloth vs. disposable)
2. No emergency trips to town, or worse, the "big" town which is a 1 hour round-trip.
3. No trips to the dump to get rid of disposable diapers.
4. No diaper rashes related to chemicals in disposable diapers.
5. No diaper waste in the landfill. (60 times more solid waste produced with disposables which take 250-500 years to decompose)

For more facts on cloth vs. disposable diapers click here.

 
You may, or may not, find it a shocker that when it boils down to it...I cloth diaper because I'm lazy! Don't get me wrong, I love all the other reasons...but I would hate to run to the dump a couple times a week getting rid of a huge bag of diapers...smelly diapers, at that. Also the running to town JUST for diapers...not my style. I would truly rather do an extra load of laundry every other day, then waste my time and money going to town to buy a box of diapers.

So, the domino effect. I have actually had no negative comments towards my decision to cloth diaper Braden. Whenever I change his bum in public or at a friends, they actually quite admire that I use cloth and ask lots of positive questions. The only negative thing that has ever come out of a diaper change is why isn't he circumsized? That's another topic...eek! I have influenced one of my best friends and in turn her sister-in-law to cloth diaper. This makes me just beam! My new sister-in-law Jess is currently contemplating whether or not to use cloth too for their baby due in March, so I'm an open book to her. I never tell any mom(-to-be) why she should or shouldn't cloth, I just happily answer any questions that they have for me.

I have contemplated using disposable diapers on Braden at night. Full time cloth diapering is a trial-and-error thing, especially for nighttime diapers. Not one solution will work for every baby. When I was walking through the baby section at Walmart and saw that I had to pay over $15+ for a box of diapers, my decision was made immediately...I'm going to do something ANYTHING to fix my nighttime problem! The reality of that $15, is that I could buy a cloth diaper for that price and I won't just throw it out...I can use it over, and over, and over again!

So here's my question to my readers...

I would love to hear from you...please leave a comment or email me with any questions or other comments you have. Know that this is a completely non-judgmental question and I am just curious to learn and see if I can influence any others to use cloth if it's something that interests them! It's fun, addicting, money-saving, environment-saving, and great for baby's bum!
  If you haven't already, please feel free to visit my cloth diapering page for more information and resources!

*Update/Edit October 11, 2011*

Wow. The comments have been rolling in and I got my first "hot" comment from WeeMasonMan's Mom. I thought I would share, just so I can be more clear on the intent of this post:  

I pay approximately $20 - $25 for a box of 174 diapers on amazon.com - I fin the "money you spend on disposables" figures to be quite inflated. I also think that a LOT of people who use cloth spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on cute patterns and new styles, wet bags, and water bills their top loading washers cause, so the money arguments aren't always so accurate.

I actually wrote a post about how I hate most of the arguments for cloth because I find them to be totally untrue. You can read it in full here http://omgababy.com/index.php/2011/08/16/displsable-diapers-are-not-the

Since Amazon delivers to my door on a set schedule, I never have to go to town for diapers and I've never ran out.

My son is nearly 18 months and he's never had a diaper rash. Nor have I ever had to triple rinse a diaper and research washing tips for problems with ammonia scent or lack of absorbency.

Don't get me wrong, I think people who cloth diaper are doing a great thing for the environment and I had originally planned to be one of those people. I just hate all the "people who use disposables are obviously missing the boat" mentality that surrounds it.

And my response, word for word:

Hi WeeMasonMan’s Mom,

Thank you for reading my blog and for your comment. 

I know it is impossible to set our tones when writing, but I did not write my blog post to start an argument or a debate on cloth vs. disposables. I know I gave my 5 reasons why I choose to use cloth, but I wasn’t intending on starting a debate. Those are my personal reasons, as well as facts, depending on what you buy and how you use them of course.

As a Canadian mom, Amazon.com and Diapers.com (as my other readers and friends have mentioned) are services not available to me, and not in Canada as far as I’m aware. I got my figures from KellyWels.com, RealDiaperAssociation.com and apologize if you find them to be untrue. I have not done “hard core” research into the subject matter because while this is something I’m passionate about, it’s not something I’m going to waste my energy arguing on. 

Many moms, including myself have found little to no change in their electricity bill due to the extra washing from using cloth diapers. If someone wants to spend more money on “cute” diapers with patterns and buy new styles and wet bags, that’s a personal choice and not a necessity to cloth diapering or saving money. All I know is for me, it is the right choice financially for my family as discount diapers are not available to me as a Canadian mom, delivered on a schedule, on time right to my door. Also, even if this service was available in Canada, it still wouldn’t be available to me as I live on an acreage and can’t have packages delivered to my door.

I have also heard many a moms (myself not included as my son was only in disposables for 18 months) switch to cloth because of chemical burns/diaper rashes from disposables. Again, not experienced first hand by me. On the other side, cloth diaper users can get yeast in their diapers.

I have definitely done my research and know how to take care of my cloth. I’ve had problems with ammonia, never absorbency as you mention...but it’s still worth it for me and my son. I’ve also had many friends have trouble with absorbency with disposables too and finding the right ones.

I never intended to write this post on a “soap box”, I thought I made that very clear. I was just out of pure curiosity wondering why people choose disposables vs. cloth. 

This is one of those things people can argue into the ground on either way. I’m not up for a debate because I didn’t write this post to start one. Again, I’m sorry that you took this post the wrong way and felt you had to defend yourself. I certainly don’t feel like any disposable using mom is “throwing their child to the coyotes”.

Take care,
Sarah

 -------

(Again, sorry for the small font and all the spacing, Blogger is being troublesome again)

Please also read this post of mine Cloth vs. Disposables that I wrote in June of 2010, which could be a "rebuttle" if I was the debating type *wink* to WeeMasonMan's Mom's blog post linked in her comment.

Yeesh! I am done with it. I seriously considered deleting this post because as I say like a broken record, it was out of pure curiosity. After I read that book, I literally thought "heh....wonder why people choose disposables? Wonder why people choose cloth? I should blog about that!!" Apparently a bad idea.

Show me some cloth love...someone? Please. I need a hug!

Childhood Influences

For the last month or so that Braden has actually started paying attention to TV, as you all know Thomas is his favorite and he also likes Bob the Builder. One morning, before we were the 24 hour Thomas network, I had Sesame Street on for Braden. This is not the Sesame Street that I grew up loving. I would imagine it's changed so much due to the rumors that Bert & Ernie are gay, we shouldn't be grouchy and/or homeless like Oscar, and that Cookie Monster eats too much sugar and is on the express way down diabetes lane. From this Wikipedia article on Sesame Street it also states:

"The producers decided, by recommendation of child psychologists, that the show's human actors and Muppets would not interact because they were concerned it would confuse and mislead young children."

Is it just me...or do they all look a lot happier in the "now" picture?

Back to the quote: Ass-cuse me? And they don't think that this confuses young children?

[source]

For those of you who are blessed enough to not know what those, as described by a friend, "Teletubbies on acid - are...they are Yo Gabba Gabba characters. If you follow me on Twitter, you know that we are a "no gabba gabba" household. Let me state that I do not think this show will harm, damage, or destroy my son..I personally just find it SUPER annoying and by the advice of my Mom who had to watch it all summer whilst doing respite care...decided to not ever let Braden get hooked on it!

My point in the argument, is that if the Sesame Street of my childhood days was changed so as to not "confuse and mislead young children"...why the heck is THAT allowed on TV?

It makes me sad that unless I find some old shows on DVDs Braden will never know that C is for cookies!


Luckily I have YouTube to suffice! And who doesn't like the "yip yip" martians??!?


And Braden LOVES tub time and his rubber ducky too!


Lately I have been singing this song to Braden before his nap and he loves it. Another absolutely favorite childhood memory of mine...Sharon, Lois, & Bram from The Elephant Show!


If I ever have a little girl I'm totally going to be all about Care Bears, My Little Pony, and I loved Teddy Ruxpin too! I imagine my brother could easily get Braden hooked on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles like he was as a kid too!

There will be things other than TV shows and music that I want to pass onto Braden, like eating steak and lobster on Christmas Eve with my family and opening presents on Christmas Eve (other than Santa presents, of course!) and a lot of other things that just aren't popping up right now!

What childhood influences have you/will you pass onto your children?

The Business of Being Born

My one month subscription to Netflix ran out and I "accidentally" subscribed officially as I noted that PayPal sent me the $7.99 bill the other day! Oh well, you can cancel anytime no hassle. So I've heard from friends who have Netflix that the documentaries are awesome. Well, the house is clean, Braden's sleeping....so I thought I would watch The Business of Being Born.

And it is wonderful! I'm also so thankful for the blessing of being able to have the hospital birth that I did. I had the support from Jay and all the nurses and my doctor to deliver naturally and drug free. I didn't have a long labor, but I didn't rushed or like I was in a hurry. After watching this documentary, I honestly can say that if it was available to me, I'd love to have a midwife and do a home birth. Especially having a first normal, healthy pregnancy and delivery. BUT, since I'm 45 minutes (at least) away from the nearest delivering hospital and that I don't know any midwives in Standard. Of course I would have to do more research and I haven't even THOUGHT about having another baby yet, but it would definitely be something I'd consider if it was available to me :)

To Sign or Not to Sign?

It wasn't really a question in our family, but I can see why it might be for others. I have been posting just little tidbits about Braden catching on to signing, but I wanted to do a bigger post about it. My best friend, Natalie, sent me a text one night just asking why we were teaching Braden to sign. It wasn't judgmental, it's just what friends do! So I wanted to do a post about signing. I'm not explaining it or justifying it, it's a choice that we've made that works for us and I just want to teach you about it! :)

So, firstly I saw Joy and Laura teach their kids basic signs:

• please
• thank you
• more

They probably did more signs, but those were the ones that I saw them use the most. These are the signs that we are teaching Braden and he has done all of them, not always perfect, but pretty darn close!

• more
• milk
• done
• bath
• cracker
• please

 By far his most consistent signs are "done" and "milk". He also has learned that "done" applies to when he is done: eating, drinking, reading a book, playing...etc. The reason why we've decided to teach Braden basic sign language, is not to teach it to him as a 2nd language, but just to bridge him from being completely frustrated and not communicating at all, to actually speaking and saying the words. We are teaching him to say the words, as well as to do the signs. It's working really well for him. Just this morning he crawled over to his high chair, stood up, looked up at me and did the sign for milk and said num num! Where as before, he might have just cried and fussed for no reason until I guessed what he wanted.

So here's a couple of videos of him signing...
Done:


Milk:


So that's kind of the what's what about baby signing!